5 June 2008

Everything is up side down, just for a moment i guees..

Last Monday, I felt too depress for lots of things. I couldn’t meet up with my supervisor due to the fact that she is not around for a week as she is having a workshop at Cameron Highland. But then, this state of affair doesn’t not bother me much tho. I went to Equatorial Hotel in Bangi, to collect my data. The Human Resource Manager doesn’t help me much instead she gave me the website of Malaysian Association of Hotels. By the way, as I mentioned in previous post, I told you guys that my thesis topic is gender-typing in the development of culinary curriculum at UiTM. Due to the fact that I need to chease the time and in order to complete the thesis within a month (due on 30 June, june, mind u) I need to change my chapter 2-3 (all of the contents) and switch to the new direction which my supervisor and I think that it will put me in a safe way to complete the thesis within a limited time. So now am revoke almost 70% of my writing to another topic but then it still within the context of tourism and hospitality industry- Jobs segregation among males and females workers in tourism and hospitality industry.

Now am digging for a new analysis which kills my time to do so. Last Monday, I felt so depress, as I couldn’t get anything but I was all wet due to the heavy raining. Back to my place, I felt that I am going to bow out my study and just prolong with my current plan to do something which is relating to consultancy. At the same time I felt that pembuat kek doest not concern but me (in fact I have not told pembuat keke about my current situation coz am to egg to show my weakness, but then pembuat kek should ask more frequent about me la. Dah la dia jauh drp I. So it makes me a bit sensitive and want to question “where is ur concern ”haha) I was totally down to the dirt and thank god that Daus rejuvenates my spirit not to be effortlessly defeated by the emotion which not suppose to control our self. Credit to him. Totally I felt that I was in the midst of hypertension- felt want to vomit, and felt no mood to “makan”. Well, I can feel the vibe of gawai celebration. I am an Iban and a Christian. But then. Gawai is just an heritage or custom of being an iban. A traditional session where u will celebrate it with friends. Some people may sense it is just a believe or ‘pagan’ but it is not. But now, it is just a culture (some sort of remembrances about your own roots. It is same like having limau mandarin or pesta tanglong as the symbolism of Chinese culture, or having pesta cahaya for Indians and wayang kulit or wow, is the symbolism of Malays) where you will do an open house and serve people with food and have a toast of ‘tuak’ which is made from rice and sugar only (called as tapai in malay but tuak makes u feel drunk).Dancing in the midst of ‘ruai’ which refers a kind of veranda but then it is shaded and within the “rumah’ itsef. In nowadays verandah, it is outside the house tho. So, in Iban’s architecture, the unique thing about this kind of verandah is, each of verandah is emerged with others so this make the verandah is huge and u can run all over the place, especially during gawai. Most of the time, easily for us to serve lot of people (in case your living room is not that huge) with cool and fresh air. Hardly to elaborate it here but different people will create their own chic of architecture. The view you may saw in “rumah kebudayaan and traditional of dayaks” at kampong budaya Kuching is the very primordial ones. Due to the mass media thinning out , people have poles apart image representative about their own place of living.

Well, I feel so empty due to the fact that am alone during gawai celebration, plus the tense I have from my thesis writing and the time pressure are really put me to the level where I need to work extra harder and if cant, I need to turn my seft to be an incredible hunk! Till then, I need to sign off for now~

xoxo Josh